The big thing I keep telling myself is that I love my kids too much to treat them all the same. This means a number of things to me. First, it means that if I go do one-on-one time with one of my kids, I can take one to Panda Express (his favorite!), I can go shop for new shoes for another with a stop for hot chocolate at Starbucks, and I can take another to a movie. I don't have to drag them all to Panda Express (I have one who would consider that a punishment, not a reward).
But the bigger thing is that it means that I'm granting myself permission to school them each differently.
My oldest attended MOPS as a preschooler. My current 3-year-old attends Cub Scout meetings, even though he won't be able to join for another 2.5 years (and yes, he knows how long it will be until he can join). Is one of them better off? I don't think so.
My oldest heard stories like Goodnight Moon and Paddington Bear when he was three. My current 3-year-old rarely gets a picture book (though we're doing some), instead listening to stories like King Arthur and Little House on the Prairie. Which one is getting the better education? I don't know.
My oldest spent lots of time with creative play with Duplos. My current 3-year-old is more likely to be helping to create a model of ancient Rome or to recreate a Civil War battle scene. I can tell you my current 3-year-old enjoys his Duplo time far more than my oldest did.
My oldest got plenty of one-on-one time and lots and lots of books. My current 3-year-old has big brothers teaching him to play chess, how to play marbles, how to play catch, and even how to read. Who is at the advantage here? I could argue either way.
My oldest spent hours teaching himself math through play. My current 3 year old just sits in on all his brothers' lessons and is picking up math concepts even I can't believe. My oldest might have the advantage, but then again... well, I don't know.
I can come up with long, long lists of things my 3-year-old is missing out on. Picture books, snuggle time - those are the biggies. My current 3-year-old is getting a lot that his bigger brothers didn't though - active time outdoors is one big one.
Comment on my original blog:
Anonymous -
sounds like my life...glad its not just me
Saturday, May 16, 2009 - 10:20 PM