Thursday, May 27, 2010

Just stuff

I needed a random blog post to clear my brain so that I can focus on the reviews I need to write.  So -- thoughts rattling around, in no particularly order:

  • I only have three reviews left to write for the TOS Crew this year!  I cannot believe how fast the year has gone.  I love all three products, but with as crazy as spring has been, I haven't used them as much as I'd like in order to give a decent review.  Thus the hesitation in getting them posted.
  • I'm trying to make some big decisions for next year.  Seriously looking at a couple virtual academies for my older two.  I'm not sure I can handle the idea of my kids being public school students, I know Dale isn't comfortable with that thought, but we're trying to make a decision that truly is in their best interests.  Connor being able to get advanced coursework in math and science sounds wonderful.  William being able to get professional help with reading sounds wonderful too.
  • How come the only Saturday in May that I don't have four or five places I'm supposed to be at once is Memorial Day weekend?  I'm not complaining.  Just wondering.
  • June, by the way, does not look any better.
  • I want a working dishwasher.  I'm sick and tired of washing dishes.  I know, I'm supposed to go in with a song in my heart, grateful that my family has food to dirty up those dishes, and feel great about how I'm blessing my family by providing clean dinnerware.  I'm terribly jealous of those of you who can do that.  Instead, I go in, resenting this broken contraption that is supposed to make my life easier, and wishing I wasn't such an ungrateful wretch that I think I deserve a working dishwasher.
  • While I'm being open and honest about my frustrations here, I want a car that works.  I hate feeling trapped in my house.  I hate feeling like I'm putting everyone's life at risk when we do go anywhere.  Did I mention I feel trapped?  
  • Wind.  Oh.  My.  It was really going on Monday.  You read stories about the pioneer women out here on the prairie going stark raving mad.  Days like Monday help me to really, truly identify with them.  Especially while I'm washing dishes and moping about the fact that I don't dare to drive my boys to Scouts.  The one point where I decided to venture out, the wind ripped the door from my hands and threw me across the yard.  It's been bad before, but I've never been thrown around.  It took four of us to get the door closed again.  
  • Trying to plan out the summer is tough sometimes.  I applied for a reading program for William & Thomas, but I haven't heard anything about that.  I applied for scholarship funds for swim lessons for all of the kids but I haven't heard about that either.  Of course, I did both of those before the van started acting up.  So now I'm worried that they'll get in only we won't be able to get them there.  Sigh.
  • And I'm just tired.  I think I need a nap.  Maybe a nap would improve my outlook. 
  • What I really need is a homeschool conference.  At least I ought to be getting the mp3s from the Schoolhouse Expo this weekend.
  • Oh, and I think I'm going to splurge on a game this weekend.  For ME.  From Big Fish Games.  If you get on their mailing list, they are supposed to be sending a 30% off code good this weekend.  That means a bit under $5.  I'm thinking about something totally fluffy like Mall-a-palooza.  I should do something that is a bit more intellectual, like Brainiversity.  Or, really, I should use that $5 for something we actually need.
  • I need to stop reading posts and articles telling me how if I only read aloud to my kids with some regularity, they'll effortlessly learn to read and write, especially when it is a loving mom doing the reading aloud -- since Mom just naturally knows exactly what Junior needs and is the best possible teacher.  They just depress me.  Especially when it comes from people who ought to know better.  Wish I could link the one that brought my blood pressure up yesterday, but I have no idea where it was.  I hate when I let ignorant people make me feel guilty for not having some idyllic homeschool life.  Or when I feel guilty for looking for some outside help.  (And if you aren't a long-time friend of mine, I DO read aloud.  A lot.  Always have.  Way more than almost anyone else I know.  Reading aloud is very important, but it isn't a talisman.)
Aren't you glad you came over to read my ventings for today? 


Tristan said...

It sounds like you need a hug ((HUG))!

Just a quick suggestion related to the dishes - use those children! Now is the perfect time to train them all on how to wash, dry, or put away dishes (depending on age). Work yourself out of a job woman!

Mrs. White said...

The children's reading will improve over time. Try not to stress about it. You are doing a great job!

And I agree with Tristan - have the children do the dishes!!

Mrs. White

Deb said...

Sorry you are having a tough time. I agree, the wind is crazy-making.

When I get cabin-fever, I like to leave the kids with Dad for the evening and hit the Starbucks drive-thru. Then I visit Barnes & Noble and make secret notes of the books I want to read. When I get home(after the kids are in bed), I go online and reserve them at the library. An evening alone for $3!

Hope you feel better.

Alane @RaH said...

You have permission to do what is *best* for *your* kids, Debra.....we are blessed to live in a country where (for now) we have the choice to do what is best for your kids. If online school is it, then go for it :o)
Oh. my. goodness. reading aloud...yes, you do more than any. person. I've. ever. know. Brush it off. You are fantastic and God gave you your kids because they needed you, and you them. ((hugs))

Tess said...

Just thought I'd say "love ya". You know, but I think you need to hear it. Love ya!

Marie said...

I love this lets me know you're just as real as me ;-)
I'm reading "Homeschooling for the Rest of Us" and you'd love it. I read about it on a blog...was it your's??? talks about not comparing yourself to those "perfect" homeschoolers. We are all real people with real problems and no one is going to do it all perfectly, except the Duggars, right? :-)
You know what your family/children need. Pray and ask for guidence and then go where He leads.
Blessings to you!